Why Are We Going to Homeschool?

I've spoken here and there (mostly on IG) about the decision we've made to homeschool when the girls get school-aged, but I've never fully explained why or how we made this decision. I recently posted a "questions" box on my Instagram stories regarding homeschooling and the question asked most was: what made you decide to homeschool? 

I imagine this is the number one question all homeschool families are asked. Honestly, I wish I had one, concrete answer that I could spit out quickly anytime the question arises - because I'm sure it will be asked a hundred more times. Unfortunately, there is no singular answer for our family's decision. There never will be - and the answer(s) will continually change.

Maybe you're sitting there thinking, why would anyone want to homeschool? I feel you. I've been there. If you'd asked me five or six years ago if I wanted to homeschool my children one day - the answer would have been n o p e. A big fat no. No thanks. Why would anyone want to do that?

Fast forward five years and here I am about to divulge into why we are going to homeschool. Just another thing to add to the lists of "never say never" - especially before children. #amiright

So I've learned a lot over the past few years about homeschooling and I would say all that I've learned has played a role in our decision. I know homeschooling isn't for everyone. I also know that some may be interested, but it's just not an option. So I have no judgement towards those who don't and I hope there's no judgement towards myself or anyone who chooses to do so. We are all just trying to survive parenthood and make the best decisions for our own families.

So let's get into it. I'm not listing these in any type of ranking order. Some reasons are more significant, yes, but all these reasons add up to why homeschooling is going to be for us!

We have a relatively limited time with our children. 

So if you consider a full life, in the grand scheme of things, our time with our children is incredibly limited. A mere 18 years. If you live to be 80+, that's less than a quarter of your life that your child is with you as a child. If they're going to school five days a week for seven to eight hours, doing 30 minutes to two (plus) hours of homework after school, and then you add extracurricular activities and sports in the mix, that time is even less. Being together is a joy - and being together is a huge benefit of homeschooling.

All children learn differently. 

Unfortunately, when children get into school, all children are expected to learn the same way and at the same pace. And that's just not reality. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to education and learning. Not all ways of learning suits every child. In fact, I believe this type of singular, controlled teaching can foster an early dislike of learning. I think this type of forced learning causes push back from the child that can manifest itself in several different ways (behavior, disinterest, anxiety, suffering, attention issues). Children should love to learn. It's their nature. And as true as it is for us as adults, if you're forced to do something, you just don't always want to do it.

Adding to this. If two children, the same age, are reading at different paces (levels), that doesn't mean that one is behind. The one behind will catch up. In any given classroom, it's likely that there are children with advanced reading skills and others that may be behind his peers. In the grand-scheme of life, that is ok. That's not the problem here. The problem is that those who are ahead should be given the tools to keep moving forward - and those who are behind, should be given the resources to keep learning at his own pace. Instead, they are grouped together and forced to slow down or catch up - which isn't fair for either student.

Piggy-backing onto this - one-on-one teaching/learning is almost nonexistent. How can any teacher with a class of 30 students be expected to give quality time to each child to meet their individual needs? She can't. And while children should be given opportunities to learn and explore on their own - equally, they should be given one-on-one, individual time as much as they need it.

Too much emphasis is placed on testing. 

Teachers are told what and how to teach.
Children to are told what and how to learn.
They are told what to memorize and expected to regurgitate the information.

And it's all in an effort to gain a particular score on a test that comes at the end of the year. The teacher, the grade, and the school need a particular score (for varying reasons - most likely, the most important is money) and that's what's driving their entire year.

Schools have lost focus. It's no longer about children truly learning.

Politics and agendas are creeping into schools. 

Children should be taught how to think, not what to think. Unfortunately, some teachers (not all - I see you, good teachers, and I love you) are abusing their role and push their own opinions and beliefs on these susceptible children. I have a cousin in high school and a couple years ago I remember her telling me about not one, but multiple teachers that daily pushed their opinions, beliefs, and political views onto her entire class. One teacher went so far as to shame those who disagreed with him. Y'all, this is absolutely NOT what school is about. And it's not ok.

It makes me sick that teachers, or any individual in an educational position, would use their role as teacher to attempt to manipulate or persuade young, impressionable minds in an effort to make them think they same as they. Thankfully, she was smart enough to recognize what was going on - but what about the children that aren't? And how would a parent even know this is going on?

Bullying. Violence. Drugs. Assault. Bad behavior. 

All these above things exist within schools. It's in the high schools and elementary schools. The public and the private. Secular and Christian. I have a friend who told me just yesterday that her nine year old son (who is in a private, Christian school) was hearing and learning about sex from his peers. Nine years old. Nine years old is too young. Children should be children. They should not be weighed down with adult conversations. And my heart just broke that my friend was having to have this conversation with her n i n e  y e a r  o l d son.

We've all heard and seen the consequences of bulling, violence, drugs, and everything in between. Homeschooling my children will protect them from dangerous exposure at school. Call me over-protective, that's fine - because that's my job as their mother. And I take it seriously.

My girls have gone to MDO programs in the past years and there is a noticeable difference in behavior during the summer at home compared to that of the school year when they are spending time with their peers - who are taught and raised differently at home. We all do parenting differently, that's not the issue, but when my children come home saying words or phrases that aren't said in our home or acting in ways that have never happened before - that's observed, learned behavior. And thankfully it's easily correctable at this age, but what about the language and behavior as they get older? And become teenagers? That's not as easy.

We get to nurture the children's individuality and interests. 

When we start school here at home and see that one of the girls has a strong interest in a particular subject or topic - we can follow and feed that interest. We can incorporate a trip to the library to check out books on their new love of bugs, marine life, our solar system, or the water cycle. We can take a field trip on any given day to a park or a museum and learn out in the real world. (And also will most likely have the museum or park all to ourselves!) We are not bound by the confinement of four walls. We will not have to strictly follow any plan or yearly schedule - we aren't forced to move on to the next subject (or topic within a subject) because we have to meet a deadline or squeeze everything in. We will move at our own pace, stop and explore when a new interest blooms - and that's how a love of learning is fostered.

We get to avoid the morning craziness. 

We are not morning people. It's likely that on any give day we may not be out of bed until 9a.m. Yep, it's true. I worked really hard to train my girls to sleep in late. I love sleeping in! It's not every morning, but if we had a late night or just want a slow morning, we have the option to sleep in. To take it slow. To not start school until after lunch, if that's how the morning is going. There's no rush to get out the door or make sure a signed paper made it's way back into the folder. And all of this sounds fabulous to me.

We get to avoid the evening craziness.

After school and evenings can be just as crazy as the morning, right? Homework, projects, practice, games, on the go dinner, last bit of homework, at home reading, and then bedtime. Maybe that's not everyone's evening routine, but most nights when I was in school - this was life. It hurts my mama heart to think that, if they were to go to school, the hours after school may get clogged with more school work or scurrying around town until we make it home to eat dinner and go to bed.

With homeschooling, school doesn't have to last from 8-3, it doesn't need to take that long. On our busiest days, maybe three or four hours. Then the rest of the day is whatever we want - more learning, fun reading, or playing outside for hours.


And the list goes on...

I could keep going, but these are reasons that have, so far, played a large role in our decision. I'm so excited that my girls will be able to learn about the world around them by actually being in it. They won't be categorized or have to worry about slowing down their learning or scurrying to try and catch up. There will be no pressure.

I heard a mother say, "Children who are interested and engaged will invariably learn so much better than children who are simply talked to at all day and assigned textbook pages to complete." How true is that? When children get into a classroom they are expected to be quiet, take notes, sit still, and learn everything that is told to them.

Memorize and regurgitate that info.

That's not learning.

Here's an example from my personal life. When I was in graduate school, my first year, I took a class on dysphagia (which is basically a swallowing disability/disorder). The class was boring. It was three hours of taking notes and listening to a monotone speech therapist talk about basic principles, anatomy, and physiology related to dysphagia. After that semester I took on my first acute care clinical and the majority of my caseload was patients with dysphagia. It was in the hospital, learning hands on with my patients, that I began to have a true interest in the topic. I went on to my first job as an acute care speech therapist in a different hospital and continued to feed my interests in dysphagia. And I loved it. I still do. If I ever go back to working, I want to be in a hospital working with patients who suffer from dysphagia, educating them, and doing swallow studies with radiologists. It's where I thrive.

Had I never had that first clinical experience in a hospital, I may never have discovered my love for this particular pocket of my career field. And I think that translates to the children in our schools. They may hate reading bullet points out of a textbook about history or science, but take them to a museum, a reenactment, or to the library and their interests soar and grow and are nurtured in a way a textbook could never do.

Will there be difficult days for us? Meltdowns? Doubts? Fears? Of course, all of it! But I plan to give myself, and my girls, so much grace when we begin this process and as the years more forward. But I have to say, I am so excited to start this journey.

If you've read this far, I'm impressed!

So, if you've never considered homeschooling, but now you're just a tiny bit interested - follow that interest. Dig, learn, research. It might actually be for you and your family. Before I began looking into homeschooling, I was certain it wasn't for us. But here we are.

So ask questions, read books, plug into groups, and maybe even give it a try.

We've all been conditioned to think learning can only happen at a school, using textbooks, and answering multiple choice questions. The idea of education has been dumbed down to the idea that it can only happen between the walls of a formal school building.

That's simply not true.

Homeschooling is not for everyone, I get that, but it could be for you. If you've made it this far, you must be interested. Let me know how I can help!


Here's an extra little information for your curious mind - a list of people you may know who were homeschooled (and this is actually a very small list)!

C. S. Lewis
Tim Tebow
Thomas Edison
Condoleeza Rice
Simone Biles
Ryan Gosling
Leonardo da Vinci
Claude Monet
Alexander Graham Bell
Orville and Wilbur Wright
Amelia Earhart
Mark Twain
Justin Timberlake
Abraham Lincoln
George Washington